The Mono Sessions - I

by Barthollomew Presby and The Ensemble

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about

Four acoustic versions of songs which are usually played on electric. The Mono Sessions is an exercise in finding the fundamental components of the songs of Barthollomew Presby and The Ensemble.
Recorded live to tape using one microphone, a mixer and a kenwood kx-4070 tape deck.
Play loud.

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released May 11, 2017

Recorded and mastered by the artist at the bAllAd 11 Mobile Studio while in the corner room of a house between a park and a busy street in Bloomington, MN.

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Barthollomew Presby and The Ensemble Minneapolis, Minnesota

Barthollomew Presby and The Ensemble are a one man freak-folk band from the blue moon back room. They enjoy, among other things, drawing, telling tales, singing stories, and meeting intriguing people on the street.

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Track Name: A Religious Song [mono version]
I woke up like any other day; snoozed my alarm clock five times before i got up on my way out of bed, up and Adam out of bed.

Damn... let's try that again.

I woke up like any other day; snoozed my alarm clock five times before I got up on my way out of bed. On my way out of bed
Then I poured my cereal. My sweet, sweet cereal. If I knew it were my last bowl i probably would have poured more.

Still i said "oh Jesus Christ i thank you for this life and all the other ones you let me live. Jesus Christ i thank you for this life and all the other ones you let me live."

then i heard a knock on my door. and so I answered my door. there was a girl there. She said she had some questions for me if only she could implore me. but i said i had no time i had to go commit a crime or something. but she didn't buy my story. I could tell cause she looked really angry. oh yeah.

and i said "oh Jesus Christ what happened to this life and all the other lives you let me live. Jesus Christ i thank you for this life and all the other lies you let me live."

Then she blew my mind. Quite literally. BOOM. now there's dirt on the floor. And blood on the ceiling. then i floated to the sky. I saw my body hit the ground and i knew i died. then she walked into my house, but i couldn't tell you what 'cause i floated into a cloud.

oh yeah and i said "oh Jesus Christ what happened to this life and all the other ones you let me live. Jesus Christ i thank you for this life and all the other ones you let me live."

and so i got to heaven. asked God "what the hell just happened?'
he said "I don't even know, son, why don't you go ask Buddha?"
and so i went to ask Buddha. i asked him the same question.
he said "you broke to many things and, boy, that's karma. but before you go back to earth, let's listen to Nirvana."

(then Buddha grabbed a record called nevermind off his shelf and started playing "come as you are". but before we really could get into it-)

I flew back to earth as a beautiful eagle. I flew across the earth and defeated some evil. and i flew through Minneapolis. And ran into a big glass building. and was picked up by a dog. was picked up by a little beagle. and was carried through the streets. my majestic eagle.

and i said "oh Jesus Christ what happened to that life and all the other ones you let me live for that matter. oh Jesus Christ what the fuck happened to that life I know i know i know i know i know. yeah.

And so wen i got back to heaven Jesus was there and he was sorta laughing.
he said, "what happened this time?"
i said "oh, you wouldn't believe me if i told you."
and he said, "ah, shoot, man. shoot."
and i said "Karma's not just any dog. It's specifically a beagle."
and he said "karma's not just any dog? It's specifically a Beagle?"
and the Jesus and i laughed.
Track Name: (0,0) [mono version]
One man said to another man, "Who do you suppose is living up stairs?"
The other replied, "I think his name is Bob."
But the first contradicted, "I thought his name was Robert."

Now they're at a standstill. They don't know what to do. Then one has a bright idea now all two have an issue.

And you know what they say? Well, I . . . never told you before. So you couldn't know unless you were very perceptive to it all. It's been said a million times, and they'll say it some more. You know what they say? Well, I might as well tell you now.

"LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. NO!"

Oh, two children in a sandbox; One draws a line, tells the other not to cross it. Then the other draws another line that crosses the first . . . as well as a third child.

Now they're at a standstill. They don't know what to do. Then one has a bright idea now all three have an issue.

And you know what they say? Well, I told you before in the last verse. They say it again and again and again and again and again and it repeats like the chorus. And you know what they say? Let's say it some more. Were you paying attention? They say,

"LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. NO!"

A whole bunch of politicians and world leaders. They never seem to get along. No! Some want resources while others just want freedom. So if you can't join 'em beat 'em.

Now they're at a standstill. They don't know what to do. Then one has a bright idea now the world has an issue.

And you know what they say. I told you before. They've said it a million times, yet still, they go to war. You think they would have learned by now, but I guess they're all children sayin' their own damn thing, making their own damn buildings. Doing everything they please and it puts you on your knees. So you get back up and fight, for what your country tells you is right.

"LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR! LET'S GO TO WAR EVEN THOUGH WE DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR. NO!"
Track Name: The Cyclical Search for Meaning and Purpose as Experienced by Ducks and Cockroaches and Humans [mono version]
Flying over mountains
singing a song
that your ancestors taught you
long before you were born to this world
in which people will call to you
only to shoot you right down to the ground
where a hound will retrieve you
and bring you to his master
and the master will cheer
at this wondrous desaster
and then thing you know
you're server on a table
and you are unable
to cry for your mother

C'est la vie
Des cafards
when you're shot in your back yard
and everything you do is a shame
'cause every life you've ever lived ends the same

next thing you know
you wake in a bright room
you cry for your mother
cause you know you face doom
and next thing you know
you're four years old
your life revolves around
doing what you're told
and next thing you know
you've reached age 18
you've given up meat
because you think its mean
and next thing you know
you're on your death bed
you cry for your mother
who lives in your head

C'est la vie
Des cafards
when you're shot in your back yard
and everything you do is a shame
'cause every life you live ends the same

and your mother said it will all be okay.
well let's just hope it turns out that way
and your mother said it would all be just fine
well let's just hope she's not wrong this time.
Track Name: Red Thing Blues [mono version]
You used to give me your blue heart
You used to give me your blue heart
Then it all just fell apart
Now i got the blue but none the heart
And there ain't no way to fix this
oh no
You just gotta clean it up
And there ain't no way to fix this
You just gotta clean it up

They call that "Love, Death and Flowers"
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
it's over my head now
under my bed now
I'm on the ground now
crawling around now
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
It's over my head now
I'm off the bed now
onto the ground now
crawling around now

I woke up covered in blue kisses
I woke up covered in blue kisses
and i don't know how they got there
but, hey, I ain't complaining

They call that "Love, Death and Flowers"
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
it's over my head now
under my bed now
I'm on the ground now
crawling around now
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
"Love, Death, and Flowers"
It's over my head now
under my bed now
I'm on the ground now
crawling around now

I'm in a field of blue roses
In a field of blue roses
and I couldn't tell you why
but my feet can touch the sky

so if you see me in the morning
just know that that ain't me
and if you see me in the nighttime
just know that that ain't me
so if you see me in the morning
just know that that ain't me
and if you see me in the nighttime
just know that that ain't me

I'll say it one more time.

and if you see me in the morning
just know that that ain't me
and if you see me in the nighttime
just know that that ain't me

No, it's a spirit or a phantom or something. Ya know. You might ay well just leave it alone or catch it in a bottle as it roams. If you see me just know that ain't me no more.